Friday, October 27, 2006

homecoming. halloween.

so last weekend was homecoming. and you know why it's called homecoming?? because it is. it's HOME. the whole weekend, i couldnt figure out if i was insanely happy or depressed for life. i was happy because i was there. and everything felt right. but then i would snap out of it and realize that i didnt get to go to class tomorrow. common grounds is father than a 1.3 mile radius in any direction of me. and i had no home. it sucked. things that did not suck about this weekend though.... pigskin. (i cried 3 times. it's a sickness really). the bears. the parade. suzanne was homecoming queen. breakfast with brew and haley. rachel:

and this:

the tridelt float caught on fire. like HUGE fire. i was really hoping that the whole thing was going to blow up right in front of us. that would have been awesome. the girls were all screaming and the boys were all running up with their extinguishers (since when do boys carry fire extinguishers?). but at least they made it most of the parade. the piphi float apparently exploded before it even started the parade. we dont have the best luck in the float department. oh and i ran into a few of our favorite "nicknamers" that i forgot to mention last time..... door whore. side ponytail girl. and mr.may.

one thing that my daddy taught me... he always says.... 'you dont leave a game early'. (and you dont arrive to a professional ballgame after pregame has already started. i'm more strict with this rule. i dont understand what it means to arrive at a sporting event after the players.) anyways.... it's been awhile since i've been to texas, but apparently, it's still hot there. even in october. so as we were blistering in the sun, and the bears were disappointing again, we made the executive decision, and the next best thing.... we went to common grounds at the beginning of the fourth quarter, when we were down 18 points, and the bears were being the bears. and i immediately regreted this decision. this turned out to be the most detrimental decision of homecoming 2k6, because within 15 min, me and rachel began recieving updates from those more faithful fans who (obviously sat in the shade) told us that we were about to, in fact, win. and we did. aggies beware.

the weekend was a huge success. however... i went with a plan. and i was going to do it all for you journal readers, because if it had actually happened.. it would have made for an excellent journal entry... and let's be honest, lately i've been hurting for material. you know what i hate? mindless, petty, fake small talk. back in college it was "where ya from? what's your major?" but when you go back to baylor, you have to answer the question "so where are you now? what are you doing?" ... well i was prepared. usually at homecoming you see alot of people that you dont really care about but you feel obligated to talk to because there was once a time where you wore the same tshirts and this qualifies for automatic friendship. so when i saw these people... and they started in with the smalltalk, while i contemplated what i was going to order at my next trip to common grounds, when they actually asked me what i was doing now... i was going to tell them that i joined cirque de solei. that's right, i ran off and joined the circus. rachel laughed and thought that i wouldnt do it... but i tried to. but the dang facebook ruined it for me! i never ran into someone that i a)wasnt really friends with and wouldnt want to lie to or b) wasnt a crazy facebook stalker and already knew that i was a flight attendant. dang it! facebook foiled again. i mean... what were they going to say? "Nu-uh. you are not. i dont believe you." no! people are stupid. they would have believed me simply because i said so. you dont dispute someone on their job title. oh well. there's always next year.

in other news. halloween is coming up. why dont we go ahead and add that to the list of things that i hate.... no... loathe!!! halloween is just a license to slut. no more plastic barbie costumes. no. let's find the skankiest "costume" possible (what i'm really amazed by is all the girls that make up a costume from things they already have in their closets) and lose all my self respect all in one night. and you know those girls are the kind of girls that just hate themselves. when did snow white, and rainbow brite become so...ahem..."grown up"? halloween hos. i hate you. (of course this is coming from a girl who has had awful luck on halloween. do i even need to revisit the kot halloween party of 2k2? or how about last year's fiji party at homecoming? OR halloween 2k4.....i did a drive by catting. it's true. betcha didnt know that, blip, did ya?)

hey guess what..... i had a postcard published on postsecret within the past couple of months. and none of you even knew. haha suckas!

Thursday, October 19, 2006

rachel rakes

rachel and i begin our "morgan and rar reunion tour 2k6" tomorrow. but for now rachel is just too dang funny not to post about her already hilarious musings.

when rachel picks me up from the airport, and i presented her with a present. (and by present, i mean a bobble head figure of an orioles player that i had never heard of that i got for free at the one and only orioles game that i went to and was planning on throwing away until it dawned on me that rachel not only loves the orioles, she also loves bobble heads) ....... speaking of rachel loving bobble heads, here is a little morsel of a story that i hope that you will enjoy. when me and rachel were sophmores in college and we lived together in what we now lovingly refer to as "the shoebox", well one morning i woke up to go to an early class and was in a hurry, but was still not trying to disturb the rar. so as i'm hurrying out the door i turn around to grab my drink and BAM! my bag hit the beloved lance bass (the gay nsync boy) bobble head doll. lance went plunging toward the floor, but not before it bounced off my closet door, and his bobbling head snapped off it's inproportionate body. (i just made that word up) at this point i dont know what to do. (you must understand that this indeed was the "beloved" lance bass bobblehead. THE bobblehead that when tridelt asked it's new members to bring an object that they cherished, and everyone else brought old letters from deceased family members, or old blankets that their granny made for them, or other various sentimental objects, rachel chose also to bring her sentimental object.... her lance bass bobble head.) well when lance decided to take his live via a snapped head, i knew rachel's beloved would never be the same. and i had to do something about it. so i took the alleged broken bobble head in question and stashed him in my bag and went off about my day, contemplating about what i was going to do about the lance. so then it hit me, i'll just buy another one on ebay, and replace it before she realizes what has happened. so i did. i bought one and had it rush delivered to our apt. then promptly put lance back in his place and prayed that she wouldnt find out the truth. several days went by and i couldnt take it anymore, so i told rachel all the sorted details of the original lance bass bobble head. and what did she do? she laughed. she laughed hard. and through her laughter she said.. i cant believe you did that. i have an extra lance bass bobble head at home. .....WHAT??? she has a back up? a back up bobble head? if i had known THAT.... i would have broken his little head off on purpose. so that was the great lance debaccle. so when i presented this little "present" to rachel to day.... a present that i didnt really understand..... she screamed. (and just so you know... "they" frown up people screaming or causing a ruckus in or around the airport) she was delighted to say the least. and then she proceeds to tell me.... oh good! i had to get rid of the lance bass bobble head because i cant support homosexuality. ........all that to say. rachel rakes likes her some bobble heads. (is it strange that i write so much about rachel rakes in my journal)

so then on the ride home she says to me.... you know what my new pet peeve is? i hate it when people have their blinker on and i give them ample time to get over and they take 20 min to get over. and to that i responded... well do you know what my new pet peeve is? i hate it when people use the word ample to describe a girl's boobs or butt. (and for your sake, i hope you erupted with the kind of fun laughter that we did after this was said) is it not true?

then we had fashion show. girl's know what this is.... this is where we try on our cutest outfits and decide what to wear for the forthcoming homecoming weekend. i am currently trying to talk rachel out of red shoes, skinny jeans, and topless. if it was up to her. she would. this may take the rest of the night to talk her out of.

"morgan, you realize that no one thinks we are as funny as we do." -rachel rakes

Sunday, October 15, 2006

wuv. tru wuv.

i have heard someone once say that riding the jumpseat with someone is like going on a blind date. and it's true. when i go to work, i'm always kind of nervous about who i am going to sit jumpseat with, its kind of awkward at first, sometimes it's great, sometimes its horrible, there are always the same questions... what did you do before this, are you married, do you have kids, so on and so forth...... so i just got back from a trip where i was sitting next to a new guy. he was on his first month. so when i asked him what he did before this he said.... well i'm 58 years old, i've done alot of things. he told me that he had lived in california and opened up all kind of different restaurants, then he said that he moved to the east coast to marry his high school sweetheart...... i gave the obligatory "awww" ...but then he went on. he said... yeah we got married valentines day 2005 on the regis and kelly show. .....uhh....what?? then he told me one of the sweetest stories. the kind of stories that fairy tales and movies are made of. he said that him and his girlfriend broke up at the end of high school because she went to new york for art school, and he went to california to begin his restaurant business. ten years later he was walking on a beach and heard a familiar "Bo?".... she had recognized his voice and it was him. at the time they were both seeing other people so they visited for a while and then went their separate ways again. then about ten years later they met again. this time they were both single. they began dating and moved in together. then their house burned down and they lost everything. their relationship suffered too and they soon broke up and moved away from eachother again. about 15 years passed. they didnt speak. he got married. she got married. he got divorced. she got divorced. and after all these years, he still felt the same about her and wanted to find her. he got on one of those people finder web sites and started his search for her. but little did he know, she was doing the same thing. somehow the producers of the regis and kelly show got ahold of the story and decided to reunite them. on the show he was reunited with his old friend. then they began dating. they figured out that they still felt the same way and decided to get married. when they told the producers of the show, they were like.... well you have to let us give you a wedding. so they agreed and they had the most wonderful wedding and it was broadcast on national television. every year they go back to the show for their anniversary. he showed me pictures. it was amazing. he was telling me about all the perks of their wedding.... his wife had a 5 karat wedding ring, he had the wedding ring that brad pitt, you know... when he was married....before he got with that do-gooding whore. they had their reception at the 21 club in new york, they sent them on their honeymoon to the most luxurious resort in fiji, he said everything was the best of the best. but then he said... you know, those are just the things that the show gave us, it doesnt even compare to getting to be married to her. and our history. there's just so much substance to us. i love her and it's just.... i cant even describe it. it's amazing how everything just worked out. this is him.... at age 58!!! he said he got this job because his exwife (whom he is still very good friends with) has been a flight attendant here for 30 years and has really helped him with this job.
isn't that the most wonderful story?? zach braff should have made a movie about THIS story... it would have been better than scummy movie the last kiss.

Tuesday, October 10, 2006

nicknames.

i write things down. and i dont easily throw things away. these two things combined... i found a list that i made with my roommates with of all of the nicknames we had for people in college. here are some of my favorites......
track alex, morgan's husband, the hermits, the one, the guy with the really good hair, floam raper, bad prom date, side ponytail girl, nice lindsey, cow, hoobity-boobity (in conjuntion with the shaggin' wagon), the redest rose in the garden, hawaii sarah, ruthie baby, yellow hat pigtails girl, ky-ky, the most annoying girl in the world, the little boy, abercrombie boy, naked amy, not so cute girl (who is the same as sharp teeth girl), amy B., bo-bo the clown, the loon, common grounds boy

and that got me thinking about nicknames that i've had. (or at least the ones i know about) i love nicknames. they're so endearing.
*when i was in middle school, my friends called me carrot. (long, stupid story)
*when i was in high school, my friends called me merg.
*only two people have consistently called me morgan reid.
*i only allow brew and haley to call me mo. i hate it. dont try it, i wont answer.
*senior year of high school, i secretly went by britney custin'.
*my aunt has always called me morgan pea pie. (i didnt like playing peek-a-boo. i only liked pea-pie. i was stubborn even back then)
*one of my favorite teachers ever always called me morgana.
*the standard nickname is morg.
*caroline reed and abbey have always called me moron. not one of my particular favorites.
*one of the "cool teenagers" when i was little at church called me streak.
*before i was born i was called baby Olajuwon .... or so i'm told.
*chad and rick have always called me Lucy. (they think i look like lucy from the peanuts.)



oh, and of course i'm friends with regina. we've met, went to a record signing of hers. we're practically bff. i'm speaking of regina spektor. if you havent heard of her before.... well... you wouldnt like her anyways.

here's a question....what is WRONG with people??? story. so a couple of weeks ago i was on a 4 hour flight. and i was shamelessly plane flirting with this guy. it's true. so he ends up coming to the back and talking for almost the whole flight. then he asked for my number.... so i'm thinking score. so i said sure.... and i start writing it down... 9-0-3.....and as i'm writing i ask, "so why are you going to nashville?" (still writing) 2-7-9...... and he says "oh to visit my girlfriend.....0-6-3-1 (note: that part after his answer isnt my phone number) then without skipping a beat i handed it to him and told him he should probably return to his seat. and by probably, i meant, if you dont i'm going to open this door and throw you out the window you disgusting creep.

you know... it's really not acceptable to go any amount of time with no toilet paper.