Saturday, September 23, 2006

a movie review. with some other stuff.

well i went to dallas to see rachel. (and if your reaction to this is "ugh, i cant believe you came to dallas and didnt tell me"... dont bother. apparently the distance from dallas to fort worth is entirely too far for some of you to travel. it's not too far for rachel so therefore i go to dallas to see her when i get the chance and not you.) and to see the last kiss. and now i feel that i must inform the masses. because i believe that the masses deserve to know..... do not. i repeat.... do NOT go see "the last kiss". i know that i was obsessing over it just a few weeks ago... but let me tell you... if there was ever a time for me to say that i was wrong..... it is now. it is an awful movie. i've never felt like that after seeing a movie. it's worse than Closer. i know some of you will go see it just because i have said not to. but i'm just warning you... dont do that to yourself. i will never see that movie again... unless i am feeling especially masochistic. i have lost all hope in people. in relationships. in the future. i know it's dumb for me to base loss of hope on a movie.... but the themes in this movie have truth in them. it happens everyday. it was a little too real for me. dont go see it. for all of you that wasted your money on the book "i kissed dating goodbye".....just go see this movie. not only will you want to kiss dating'll give it the finger!! i was just so mad after i saw it. like... yelling mad. i couldnt believe that i paid to see that. they should have called it... the last time you'll see this movie. or... the last time you'll believe that people are decent. even though i know jacinda barrett and zach braff are just actors...the mere thought or sight of them sickens me now. it's like....."i know you. and i know what you've done." however.. the soundtrack is outstanding. buy the soundtrack. skip the movie. rachel does an excellent job of reviewing this wretched movie as well.....

two stories now....

1) rachel astounds me. at the ripe old age of 23, the young lass did not know that deodorant is used to prevent you from sweating. it took about 5 minutes of me really trying to convince her that it was used for more than just making your armpits smell better. "rachel...what does "anti-perspirant" mean to you?"......and even then she was like .....'well...yeah...but......." she still didnt believe me. oh, and she also didnt know that nelly furtado was white. but that's a completely different story.

2) i live in ghettoville, USA. and to prove this to you i give you this story of the locals. so i'm driving to walmart....and there is a guy on the side of the road selling large prints. and one of them happens to be this one.....

except...since we are in the ghetto and all... it was the "black version" of it. i was a little offended.... i mean...come would never see the "white version" of this painting.....

if either artist had wanted the figures to be black or white....they would have made them that way. i believe that making a white version of the latter painting .....well i believe you'd get yourself shot there.

let's talk about pressure for a little bit here.... in flight attendant was never a guarantee to us that we would make it all the way through graduation. 12 people from my class got sent home during training. and now... for 6 months... the ones of us that made it through training are on what is called "probation". basically... i cant screw up or i get fired. since graduation.... they have given three people the boot. THREE! and we're only half way through probation. now that's some pressure. but you know what might be more stressful?? i'm on this trip with this guy and girl a couple of days ago... and the guy says to me (i had never met him before).... 'oh i got so excited when i found out i was going to be working with someone named morgan because my fiance and i are about to have a little girl and we are going to name her morgan" .....oh well great. thats fine and all.... but now i have to put on my best version of "cool morgan" so he doesnt think that he is making a mistake naming his child morgan. i had to do the morgan's of the world justice. i mean... what if i was a total bitch on the trip and he hated me. dont tell me you dont associate people's names with other people you have known with the same name. for example.. i will never name my child brandy. i've never known a brandy who wasnt a complete ho. i will never name my child sarah. does the name sarah berg mean anything to you?.... anyone who knows this name knows that i'm talking about. i dont want my child to share her fate. or.... candice. candice blaylock tried to kill me in the 5th grade. (dont laugh. i'm serious) i know that girl has to be behind bars by now. you associate names with other people you know with the same name. there are other names...... let's just leave it at that.

Friday, September 15, 2006

on music and getting my fash' on??

hey remember that friends episode... the one where phoebe has a cold and she realizes that she has man voice??? yeah... thats what i sound like. except by the end of the episode she had gotten rid of hers..... and i've had mine for three days. add that to the list of things that suck.

can we talk about music for a little bit here? more specifically "pop music". i really dont know why everyone is against pop music. there is a time and a place for britney spears. dont act like there's not. but these alleged pop songs of today.... i really just dont get them. for instance... let's take fergie's new song.... "london bridge". she sings.... "how come everytime you come around my london, london bridge want to go down" can anyone tell me what that means? i've never been to london... maybe it's a british thing. is it some kind of metaphor? 'my london bridge want to go down'... i wouldnt describe anything on my body as a bridge of some sort..... and here's another one.... the pussycat dolls (which are just shamelessly whore-ish... i've never met them... but i'm pretty sure they are the exact kind of girls that i would despise.....dont you wish your girlfriend was hot like me??.... what is that????..... i digress) anyways... they've got this song called "loosen up my buttons babe"..... huh? unzip my zipper would have made more sense than this. dont they know that its UNbutton. not loosen up my buttons. stupid girls. or here... lets make it even more simple.... just say: take off my clothes!! .......i'm a nelly furtado fan. it's true.... however... her new song.... "promiscuous girl".... you'll be out somewhere and you see everyone singing this song.... it's like.... do you people KNOW what you're saying. you might as well be wearing a shirt that says "i'm easy". nelly.... you've got a KID. a child. promiscuous girl? obviously. ....and while justin timberlake is trying very hard to bring sexy back.... i'm working equally as hard to bring back the j. lo butt and dancer thighs. .....but the saddest thing of all might be that i like these songs. i admit it. they come on and i turn into a dancing fool. i'm so ashamed.

i HATE today's "fashion". hate it. despise it. refuse to wear it. come on now... the 'skinny jean' and here's another one.... tights? dont you people recognize that this is nothing more than tapered jeans and leggings? the official fashion of accessory of middle schoolers and las vegas tourists? tapered jeans! they just think they can sell more of them by calling them "skinny". .....the big girl jean.... now there's a fashion trend i could get behind... or maybe get my behind into. i even saw a girl the other day sportin' jellies. i mean what's next???..... vests??? those big clunky mustered colored combat boots? doc martins? oh and here's another monstrosity..... belts over sweaters? come on now... we made FUN of the kappas for making their pledges wear those hideous sweaters with the big belts... and now it's considered FASHION?? (sorry kappa friends)... they would find a way to make it fashion. ju...i know you feel me on this one.

i just realized that it's friday. i had no idea what day it was. i never know what day it is. seriously. i hate that.

Tuesday, September 05, 2006

things that suck: comcast. jamal lewis. facebook "news feed".

there are things that need to be said. i cannot hold it in anymore.

comcast sucks. it's true. comcast is our cable/internet provider here in baltimore. i would go into all the reasons, but i cant find a way to make it interesting. but apparently there are some people that have made a way to make it interesting. my roommate got so mad at comcast today that she googled "comcast sucks" and she came up with quite a plethora of others that not only agreed, but made entire websites devoted to the hatred of comcast and their suck service. like this one. and this one. oh and then the one on craig's list like this one. i am usually a big trash talker, but rarely follow through with my plans.....unless you really piss me off. then it's ON. i called comcast in rages with comments like "i want you to fix my internet. and i want you to fix it now. and i want to know what you are going to do about it." very veruca salt-esq, dont you think?.....of course i always ended my rant with 'i'm sorry to be so mean'. i cant help it. niceness becomes me. i should have had mom call them. she gets things taken care of.

so me and jess found a hookah lounge/sports bar. can you think of a better combination? well once we started talking to some of the 'locals', they informed us that jamal lewis was sitting right behind us. apparently he plays for the ravens. do the ravens even have fans? seriously? well anyways... before we left, since everyone else seemed to think he was some big shot... we went over and wanted to get a picture with him. he said....and i quote......'nah'. not 'no'. ....but 'nah'. i thought that was a little veruca salt-esq as i asked him why.....cause i would definitely never say 'nah' to someone wanting to take a picture with me. he said....and i quote......'i dont want it ending up on some sort of myspace or something.' .....myspace? he's worried about big bad myspace???? well he should have been worried about big bad morgan's journal because here is a picture of, said lewis. true it's not exactly of his face. and i could be making all of this up. but it's just to prove a point. jamal lewis, you suck. and i will never even think of supporting the ravens or your career because you were rude and ridiculous. seriously......myspace?

the new facebook feature has taken the sport of stalking to all new heights today. under the pretense of "news feed", you can now find the latest news on all your friends/enemies. but really..... i could care less to know that some guy that i talked to maybe once in high school has changed one of this favorite movie preferences 12 minutes ago. and how sad is it that people's love lives are strewn about all over facebook. and if that wasnt enough as well.... if you decide to exit a relationship and change your "status", there is a little broken heart symbol by your name. did facebook ever think that maybe one of the said people in relationship would like to replace that with a happy face? i mean..... someone had to be the "dumper", surely only one of them should have a broken heart. i think that facebook is really the government in disguise. it knows everything. i checked it today and it said....."morgan, you ate 104 m&m's, and watched the same lifetime movie. twice. all before lunch". jamal, you should stop worrying about myspace...... it's facebook that you should really be scared of. well that, and "the rhythm".... because eventually.....the rhythm is going to get you.

Friday, September 01, 2006

concerts and secrets.

first order of business..... does anyone want to go see nickel creek with me in dallas on sept. 13? they're playing at the gypsy tea room. guster is playing the night after them. i want to go to both. i'm serious as a heartattack. or caner. or hypothermia. all very serious. oh and i'm also very serious that i wish i was going to be in waco this sunday.

roadtrip was successful today. it rained. i got wet. i didnt even care. the exhibit wasnt as grandiose as i thought it would be. but it was fun. if you dont know what postsecret is... then please go here and find out.

it's pronounced red-ding. not reading. as in read.

cameras werent allowed..... so i went stealth with the in-the-purse trick.

the double sided cards.

they're true.

there were other parts of the museum..... will there ever come a time where i dont think it's cool to take pictures of bears and say sic 'em? .... i'll work on it.

but i just came back. i was getting braver with the camera.

then i completed my day in reading, PA by finding this awesome little obscure music store. think: high fidelity. they even had the tiny buttons.